Thursday, May 12, 2016

An Easy "Yes"

As I tossed and turned through the night, an invitation to go to a house concert in a few days rumbled through my mind. "I should say yes, it would be good", followed by "I don't feel like being social. I don't want to think about bringing food". I grew more tired as I slept, thinking of how hard it would be to go out and be around other people.

My "Year of Yes" is starting to wear thin. Yes, I can do hard things. But sometimes the "yes" has to be directed inward. I need to say "yes" to me too.

I was leaning towards a compromise. "How about we skip the concert and just get together for a visit?" sounded attainable. A one-on-one visit I could do. A group setting? Not so much.

Can you imagine my surprise to wake up to an alternate invitation from the same friend. "How about a movie?" My brain immediately translated that into "How about sitting in a dark room, sit back and be entertained and not have to say a word for 90 minutes?" I'm in. I'm all in!

I've been threatening my daycare family with the idea of a movie day. A day where we do absolutely nothing but watch movies and eat popcorn. All. Day. Long. My little three year old friend was all over that idea. "Sometimes me and my dad watch movies and eat popcorn!" I could have easily convinced her three year old buddy to join us, as long as he could sit on the couch with his blanket. The problem was with their energetic, non-stop, need to play, have fun and be stimulated younger daycare buddies.

That idea was not going to fly. So I started promising myself a movie day on Sunday. A day where I would sit back and watch whatever my heart desired. I wouldn't pinpoint a need to be fulfilled like prior Sundays. I would not specify that my entertainment be life affirming, stimulating and fill me with positive thoughts. I would simply sit back and be entertained. And eat popcorn. The end.

When my friend proposed the idea of going out to see a show, I thought a movie night was the perfect way to kick off my movie day which is scheduled to follow.

It was the easiest "Yes!" I've said all year.

Sometimes "yes" just has to be easy. Sometimes "yes" means saying yes to what you want to do and no to what you think you should be doing. Sometimes, you just have to follow the path of least resistance.

Besides, my sister told me this, "You need to satisfy your needs first and you NEED  REST. ( Brain and Body)."

As Brené Brown says, "Write yourself a permission slip" to do what you need to do to take care of yourself. Apparently I haven't been very good at that but I play to use my sister's words as permission to give myself a break.

I am going to give my brain and body a rest this upcoming weekend. I hope you give yourself permission to do the same. And if you have trouble with that, I hope you have someone in your life like my sister. Someone who reminds you to be gentle with yourself and take what you NEED.

This is your permission slip to:
Do nothing
Do what you need
Do what you want
Spend time alone
Spend time with others
Be kind to yourself

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