Monday, March 25, 2013

Starting From Neutral

It is Monday morning and I sit and await the wonders that will behold me this week ...

{Birds are singing, the sun is shining and little animals are chattering in Disney-like voices as I create the fantasy that is that sentence}

My reality is that I am sitting here in a neutral state as I face up to whatever the day/week brings.

I felt underwhelmed with the 'person that was me' last week. I want to do better this week. As I tell my little daycare family - 'when you know better, you do better'. I must forgive my little charges for not doing better, when they know better. Because I am guilty of the same crime. I will try to do better.

Little things are niggling away at my little aura of sunshine and happiness. Things that truly don't matter in the whole realm of things. Timing is everything sometimes. Waiting for the right time and the right words eats away at my sense of 'rightness' in my world until the slate is cleared and we can start fresh once again.

My life is inching forward in a direction that feels very good and very right for me. I am taking baby steps and looking into the future. Perhaps too far into the future? Is it right to be instigating changes this far in advance? Everything inside of me is telling me that this is the right strategy. Yet experience has taught me to expect the unexpected. I have one foot in the present and the other stepping towards the future. My sense of balance is a little askew as I look forward.

I have (perhaps?) a few too many irons in the fire. I am a little bit torn and somewhat frustrated that I am not honing in on one thing and doing my best with it. Yet when I walk away and look at this from a distance, I see that I am hedging my bets a little bit here. I'm diversifying my knowledge and abilities so if one thing goes awry, I have a back-up plan (and income). And a little 'retirement planning' to boot.

I know that I am the only one who can turn this state of being neutral into driving in a forward direction. I will start today with a fresh slate and do the best I can. Some days, my best is better than others. But starting from a neutral position without a bias on the negative is a good beginning.

One never knows what the day will bring. It is truly better that way.

Take the day one step at a time and make it into the best day that you can with whatever life hands you today.

Happy Monday!

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