If You Ask Them ... They Will Come

I crawled back into my shell for a while.

As I adjusted to going to school, invested myself in our weekly family suppers and my little family, immersed myself in the dance world, got through Christmas and have had a whirlwind new year as I lived my dream of attending a dance competition ... I stopped inviting people into my world.

I have stepped back into life, with gusto.

It was instinctive. It felt right. So I asked. And people are responding ...

First of all, I knew that must get myself motivated in putting together my dad's family story. So I sent off one email. The result of that email is a gathering of several cousins from one family. I invited seven; three have confirmed that they will be able to attend; a few others can't make it (though I'm still making the 'family connection' and I believe that one way or another, this cousin and I will find a way to share some memories and make some new ones). And I'm still awaiting a few replies ...

In just over one month, I'll be getting together with my cousins. I love the excuse to gather my family around me. These are cousins that I don't know very well. So I'm welcoming the opportunity to get to know them.

Then ... there is an Easter family gathering that is beginning to come together. It all started with Mom coming out for a visit (on a weekend that just so happens also to be her birthday). She made an off hand comment about my sister's family not having any set plans for Easter ... and I was off and running. Hey! This is something I can do!! This is a sister that goes out of her way for one and all. If I could manage to house a gathering at my house (which just so happens to be in a pretty central location), I would be thrilled. So I asked the rest of my family to join us as well.

Our family has grown to rather amazing proportions. So the gathering of the clan doesn't happen too often. My Oldest has such fond memories of the days when all of us used to get together on a semi regular basis. The memories that he has, of playing with his cousins still make his eyes sparkle. He has a renewed appreciation for 'everything family' these days ... and I'm so excited to be able to extend this invitation. He has motivated me into remembering that our family ties must be nurtured.

This has come together rather quickly and I'm so glad that it is happening. I'm still waiting for a final tally of numbers. But I sat down and figured out the logistics of sitting 35 people down for a meal. And it can be done. In fact, I could have more ...

My third adventure involves a childhood friend. This is a friend that I reconnected with in December. Our families grew up and lived in the same rural community. Her aunt knows my dad's family well ... so I asked my friend if she thought her aunt would mind if we came by some Sunday afternoon to do some memory gathering. And ... we are going to do just that!

I am asking ... and people are responding.

It scares the socks off me when I take the risk of asking people to come and join me in my little corner of the world. There is that moment of truth between the invitation being extended and receiving an answer that makes me wonder if this is the time that I'm going to get shot down. The idea of going to visit an old neighbor, from a community that I moved away from 40 years ago?! Beyond frightening!

But then I get the response.

An overwhelming 'Yes!' from one ... a leery 'But if I ask them, they may all say yes ...' from another. An 'I wish we could ... but we can't' from a third.

There was an 'I think it's an awesome idea to get everyone together ...' but we have plans from one cousin. Another 'I'm so glad you are part of our family' (and taking the initiative to write these stories down) from another ... and preexisting plans from one more.

Then there was the biggest risk of all. My request to collect family stories from an old neighbor who I know by name only. And her response? She was thrilled to be asked! Right on the spot, she rhymed off a handful of memories that she had to tell me.

Wow!

It's comfortable and very cozy in this little shell of mine. But when I do peek my head out and invite the world in ... it's amazing.

I've had these people around me all of my life. Who knew? All I had to do was ask ... and they will come.