Thursday, August 6, 2009

Giant Steps

Don't be afraid to take a big step. You can't cross a chasm in two small jumps.’
- David Lloyd George

As I look towards my decision to go back to school, I seem to be standing on the ledge of that chasm, looking at the giant step ahead of me a lot these days ...

I've had a few moments of the fear of falling (failing). But those pass quickly. I know that I can do this. I've done it before and I can do it again.

I've had many thoughts of the fear of abandoning the tried and true and taking a leap of faith towards the future. I can visualize the end result of this choice to continue my education. I can see myself walking the path to get there. I know that I am already well on my way (I already have a book keeping job ... how much more fortunate could I be?). I know that this step towards my future is a positive one.

I wonder if the 'other side' of this chasm I am prepared to leap is all I hope that it will be. I do have other options here on the safe side of the abyss. A job that I could return to - a 'guarantee' (if there is such a thing as a guarantee these days) of a set wage, good benefits and a pension ...

But I want more than a pension when I retire. I want a life. I want and need to continue to work. I need the structure and the deadlines that a job imposes, to provide the boundaries that define work and leisure. Getting an education and experience in the book keeping field will provide me that option.

As much as I enjoyed my holiday, by the end of it I was losing my ambition and drive. I didn't have appointments, commitments or a schedule to define my days. I wandered aimlessly through those days and wasted many moments. I thrive on the sense of accomplishment. That was sorely lacking on the last days of my vacation.

The more I think about this decision, the more I am convinced that this is the right road for me to take. It is leading me in the direction I want my life to go.

Yes, it is a big step. But I have complete faith that I can cross over the chasm and explore a new landscape.

I've taken many leaps of faith in my life. Every time I have chosen to redirect my life, it has been a victory. Every step that I took along the way has lead me to this day.

I have heard people my age all but give up hope at the idea of someone hiring them at this age. All I can think is "Why wouldn't they hire me?" I'm a reliable, hard worker with years of experience and I'm not afraid to keep on learning.

Success is the only outcome I see. So I'm not afraid to take this step in one huge leap. It is a leap of faith.

1 comment:

  1. "I want a life". You are so right Colleen, you have always inspired me to take more risks and do things differently for just that reason. Godspeed. Karen

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