Friday, June 26, 2009

Meandering Thoughts

My thoughts are quite literally all over the map this morning. As my fingers fly over the keyboard in the few minutes that I have before my day officially begins, I know that I won't even scratch the surface.

Random thoughts:

I am 2 weeks into the worst haircut in my recent history. I physically cringe when I see the 'bowl cut' sitting on top of my head. It is so much worse at the dance studio when I see my full image, topped up with this horribly ugly hair style.

What I am grateful for:
Hair grows
3 months from now, it should be a changed look
Maybe it will look better as it grows out
I'm not shedding more hair than the cat these days
I'm not bald

We have 2 days of summer holidays behind us. The dynamics of the kids that will be spending the bulk of the time here over the course of the summer is terrible. The 'leader' loves to run, bug, draw and say 'rude things' (this is what one year of full time kindergarten taught him), has become sneaky and is encouraging his younger crowd to do things he knows they are not allowed to do.

What I am grateful for:

Only 34 more babysitting days to go, before school begins
Quiet time
My holidays
Quitting time
The 3 days of holidays that one of 'the above mentioned families' will be taking

I felt like a hero for an hour yesterday. It was awesome!

Kurt knocked over his X Box yesterday afternoon and it scratched his brand new 'Incredible Hulk' game. He was devastated. I immediately went to EBay and put in a $9.99 bid for an identical game. But the auction isn't over for 6 days and it usually takes a few weeks to receive it by mail. It was all I could do. I thought.

Then, by some cosmic fluke of random thoughts bouncing around in my brain I got to wondering about the possibility of repairing the scratched disc. I made some phone calls and 2 calls later, we were on our way to a place that said there was a very good chance they could fix the disc for just over $3.00.

This happened just as my last charge of the day was leaving and precisely one hour before my scheduled dance lesson. We raced to the other corner of the city, got the disc repaired, made it back home in time to put together some supper for Kurt and I made it to my dance lesson with 5 minutes to spare.

In the middle of this horrible afternoon that Kurt spent, bemoaning the fact that his summer holiday was wrecked and he had nothing else to do ... I finally, finally came up with the words to go with the 'movie' I promised to make of Kurt's 11th birthday fiasco.

As I drove off to my dance lesson, I felt like such a good mom, for precisely one hour. Then ... upon my return, I was greeted by the vision of this 'repaired' X Box game sitting on the kitchen counter with a note sitting on top of it, with the blazing message "IT FROZE".

So ... back to the 'repair shop' we went. We tried again. So much for my 'Mother of the Day' award. But I still felt pretty good in knowing that I did everything I could.

What I'm grateful for:

The ability to sometimes be a little bit of a 'hero' to someone who looks to me for guidance
That this all happened on an evening where everything unfolded in its own time and space and we had a second opportunity to try and fix the problem at hand
That the words finally came, to 'wrap up' Kurt's birthday movie. When an experience isn't all fun and games, it is harder to find the words to tell the story in a positive way
That I am a mom

Too much to do, it so little time!!

3 weeks until my holidays. And in that time, I must get caught up in transcribing the 'family memory' conversations that I have recorded. My uncle will be arriving the eve of the start of my holiday and I want that little recorder empty for any morsels of information that I may gather while he spends a day or two with me. I also plan to invite any friends/relatives in the neighborhood over, for an informal gathering so that he has a chance to visit with as many people as he can while he is in our fair city.

I have enough book keeping work to keep me busy all weekend. As they are wrapping up another year end, there are many onerous tasks to be tended. I've been wading through one of those tasks in my free minutes this week (not many) and I know that I must immerse myself in the job at hand this weekend.

What I'm grateful for:

The fact that I took last weekend off ... entirely ... and savored every single care-free moment that I had
That the pot of gold at the end of this rainbow is my 18 day holiday
That I am lucky enough to have my uncle come and spend some of his precious holiday time with me
That I have one more excuse to try and 'gather the clan'
That it's only 3 weeks

I love blog land. My post yesterday generated a few comments that made me feel that this big old world is a very small place. The dangers of the Internet are many, but when one can reach out to a 'virtual stranger' or have that same stranger impact your life in such a big way ... it is one of the positive sides to the Internet connections all over the world.

The mom that triggered yesterday's post made a comment shortly after I posted my blog (I made a comment on her blog that directed her to mine). I was touched to the core, that this mom reached out and made personal contact with me at a time when her world is turned upside down.

What this made me realize is - the fact that I have friends in my own personal world that are going through very trying times as well. Because I know them and the immensity of what they are enduring, to get through their days I haven't made that phone call (thinking that they don't have the time to talk) or sent that email (it feels too impersonal, when you know the person so well). So I've done nothing. How could I reach out to a virtual stranger and be so touched by their life when I have my own friends who need that personal contact so much more. I must do something to change that.

What I'm grateful for:

The ability to make a difference in someone else's day
The passion to write about what impacts my life
The Internet for helping a lot of people feel less alone in their pain - whatever that may be
My Life as I Know It

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