Thursday, April 9, 2009

On Being Comfortable

"Being a parent causes you to be stronger than if you didn't have children"
Gary Neuman (on the Oprah Show)

That is a statement that has been the essence behind my life ever since I became a parent. When I heard it this morning when watching the Oprah show, it resonated within me.

Every single time one of my children was born, it was a catalyst for change within me and the life that I lived.

Every tough decision that I have made, has been made with the knowledge that 'I am the parent' and I must do what is best for my children.

I wouldn't be the person that I am today, if I didn't have my children. I would have made completely different choices in my life and ended up in a different spot. I appreciate the lessons that being a parent has taught me. Sometimes I didn't know what was right for me, but when I thought of my children the answer was clear.

Any time that I have found myself in a place that was out of my comfort zone, great things happened. I couldn't appreciate the lesson that was being taught to me at the time but in looking back, I know that if I hadn't been placed in that life altering place ... I would have stayed where it was comfortable. I would have followed the path of least resistance.

As I made this realization this morning, I saw what was most likely the underlying cause of this little bit of sadness and lethargy that has crept back into my life this past winter. I am too comfortable.

It's hard to create your own waves and make the tough choices when the easy choices are so easy. I now see that is why I thrive on situations that put me just a little out of my comfort zone.

I love my private dance lessons ... but even those are a little bit better now that I've started (doing the more uncomfortable thing) going to the group classes as well. It enhances what was already there and provides me a little more room to grow and to learn.

I enjoy the challenge of the book keeping job that I do on the side ... but I am so frustrated because it is too mind-numbing, easy and I have little control over the work flow. I'd love the challenge of diving in head first and learning how to do it all (instead of bits and pieces of the job).

I am nervous about the family history projects that I am working on. I should be knee deep in revisions on the first project. I should be making moves to start researching the second project. Instead, I seem to be paralyzed and I'm going no where with either project.

At the moment, I'm standing on the ledge. Too afraid to jump, too comfortable to take the plunge. Being comfortable hasn't brought anything to me (except the extra amount of pounds that have found their way onto my body).

The work out that I really need, is the one that takes me out of my comfort zone and throws me into the next challenge of my life. Who knows where things will go from there?

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