I am thinking that I am acting and feeling rather hypocritical about the whole 'birthday' thing ...
I have some relatives that don't celebrate birthdays because of their religious beliefs. I respect their choices and I really don't give it a second thought. In fact, I applaud their integrity because I think a well chosen card, letter, gift or phone call means a lot more when it comes out of the blue and not because you are doing it out of obligation. The older I get, the more I think that they really have it right. I try, in my own way to honor their way of thinking. To send off some 'words' when they come from the heart for no occasion is something I do. And my heart feels so good when I do it.
Yet I have other friends who truly honor other peoples birthdays and I believe when it comes to their birthday, it is a gift to be able to give a little of what they give to others all year, in 'honoring' them as well on their birthday.
I like to reciprocate the feeling of the individual, whether it is or is not in 'honoring the day'. .
Mom has one of those 'milestone birthdays' coming up and our family is planning a gathering and using her birthday as an opportunity to invite our family to enjoy the day with us. The true gift to Mom, is bring her family to her for the day. And in doing so, it was my greatest wish to have all of the family attend, despite the 'beliefs' they did or didn't hold.
And I tried what I could, but it isn't meant to be. I'm saddened but not disheartened. I admire the integrity of a person who stands strong behind what they believe in.
Which brings me back to the beginning ... am I the hypocritical one since I am so willing to go either way?
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Funny thing about those birthdays - we have that same dilema in our family except not for religious reasons. Some people like the attention and others would rather not have anything focused on them, and some say one way when they really mean another. We try to look at it as a celebration day - not necessarily a birthday but a day to honour the individual - could be any day for that but just easier to pick a birthday so we know everyone gets honoured. We really should honour the people in our lives as much as some people all these unknown actors, music stars, public figures, etc. So a day to honour your mom who is one of those unsung heroes is nothing but a beautiful thing - hopefully there can be a way to make it a very special day for her.
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